The "Corrupt a Wish" Thread

[Olessius]

Granted. But in an attempt you later fell in a ditch of quick sand immobilized

I wish I had a red dragon

Granted. The dragon, however, is terribly flatulent, and its farts are mustard gas. You die horribly knowing that while it lasted, you had the most awesome pet in the history of the world.

I wish that my depth-perception was better.

[Big_Ordeal]

I wish that my depth-perception was better.

Granted. You now see the world in red and blue stereoscopic 3D.

I wish I had no allergies.

[Nelby2388]

Granted. You now see the world in red and blue stereoscopic 3D.

I wish I had no allergies.

Granted, but now you have AIDS.

I wish for world peace

[Olessius]

Granted. You now see the world in red and blue stereoscopic 3D.

I wish I had no allergies.

Granted - you suddenly awake in the middle of the night trapped in your bed, completely unable to move, with a strange man standing over you. You are drowsy, incoherent and very frightened, and as he begins to inject a strange fluid into your arm, you lose consciousness. The next day you awake feeling better than you have in a long time, despite having dreamt so strangely during the night; even though spring is right around the corner, something that would ordinarily make your eyes water and your nose run, you feel just fine. Perfect, in fact. You just want to get out in the sunshine and perhaps even smell a few flowers.

During your morning ablutions, however, you discover a strange, pin-***** scar, surrounded by puckered flesh. It is rather sore, and you decide not to touch it again. You find it very curious but think nothing of it, and begin to brush your teeth. Strangely, your gums feel very tender. Too tender, in fact. You remove the toothbrush from your mouth and lean forward to inspect your gums, and to your horror, a flood of bright red blood washes out of your mouth, splattering onto the floor. In a state of shock, you watch as the teeth of the man in the mirror wriggle, and drop from his gums. Coming to, you accidentally swallow some of the teeth, and in a state of panic you accidentally slip on the pool of blood, falling and hitting your head on the wall with fatal force.

I wish that I was shameless enough to be able to work as an investment banker without hating myself with the passion of a thousand suns.

[Big_Ordeal]

Granted - you suddenly awake in the middle of the night trapped in your bed, completely unable to move, with a strange man standing over you. You are drowsy, incoherent and very frightened, and as he begins to inject a strange fluid into your arm, you lose consciousness. The next day you awake feeling better than you have in a long time, despite having dreamt so strangely during the night; even though spring is right around the corner, something that would ordinarily make your eyes water and your nose run, you feel just fine. Perfect, in fact. You just want to get out in the sunshine and perhaps even smell a few flowers.

During your morning ablutions, however, you discover a strange, pin-***** scar, surrounded by puckered flesh. It is rather sore, and you decide not to touch it again. You find it very curious but think nothing of it, and begin to brush your teeth. Strangely, your gums feel very tender. Too tender, in fact. You remove the toothbrush from your mouth and lean forward to inspect your gums, and to your horror, a flood of bright red blood washes out of your mouth, splattering onto the floor. In a state of shock, you watch as the teeth of the man in the mirror wriggle, and drop from his gums. Coming to, you accidentally swallow some of the teeth, and in a state of panic you accidentally slip on the pool of blood, falling and hitting your head on the wall with fatal force.

I'm not granting your wish because you skipped one. Also, this made me cry. :'[

I wish for world peace.

Granted. The radioactive plants from the site of Chernobyl Eliminate all sentient life on Earth with their overgrowth.

I wish I knew what Meatloaf was referring to when he said, "but I won't do that."

[JackzBat]

I'm not granting your wish because you skipped one. Also, this made me cry. :'[


Granted. The radioactive plants from the site of Chernobyl Eliminate all sentient life on Earth with their overgrowth.

I wish I knew what Meatloaf was referring to when he said, "but I won't do that."

Granted! However knowing what 'that' is now, you cannot unknow it. And you see 'that' innuendos everywhere right up until you claw your eyes out from the creeping insanity of it.

I wish I had just given working FTL engine plans to the internet.

[mrcello1]

Granted!!! However the internet and your computer goes down and you lose FTL engine plans forever!!

I wish i had more time for my college homework!

[kxizm]

I wish i had more time for my college homework!

Granted, but the time was yesterday and you were just too lazy.

I wish my laptops battery was charged

[Big_Ordeal]

I wish my laptops battery was charged

Granted. Your laptop's battery is charged with first degree murder and put on death row.

I wish I was in Australia, alive, and in perfect health.

[JackzBat]

Granted! Everyone else in Autralia however, is dead and infected with the FAST zombie virus. Good luck with that.

I wish there had been 5 seasons of Firefly.